It's Nice talking

This Eulogy was written by Mommy Wanda's daughter-in-law, Mrs. Baby Hideliza Castillo.  - - - How Do I Remember You? (A Eulogy to Mommy Wanda) It was year 2003 when I first met you as the mother of my former boyfriend and now my better half, Redel De Vera Castillo. Your sweet smile and warm greetings gave me an extraordinary hope that you would be my in-law someday and eventually it came true. I became an official part of your family in 2006 and I had the greatest chance to know you better. For more than 15 years, I have experienced the best versions of you. A good friend, this is who you are to everyone. I have seen how you give your time to help a friend, comfort them when they needed someone to uplift their spirits and always extending your support without any hesitation. A concerned wife, this is who you are to Daddy Lum. You may not have shown him your sincerest agitation but in your heart, you are thankful that he is the father of your children. The gratitude tha...

To the love of my life, It's the start of another year and my heart is so grateful that I am still with you. Things have changed, that is undeniable. But what more could I ask for? This is what I have been constantly praying for — To be with you. More time with you. For the new year, I am thanking God that I get to spend my holidays with you. I only have a few days left before my life in that noisy city continues and I chose to spend it with you . Our set up is difficult. Real difficult. I feel as though I am a stranger in my own home. It feels different. Where's that place I've grown up in? Where's that place where we made so many memories together? I don't know where to stand, where to fit in. I don't know what happened. This is just different, so different. I can't help but feel sorry. I am sorry we had to go through this. I am sorry that it seems like it is unresolvable. I am sorry it turned out like this. I miss you. I miss everythi...

You know... I have become a cynic. I don't believe that love is all or nothing anymore. I used to believe that it was. But my heart has been broken once and I don't want to go through that hell again. Love is not all or nothing for me. Because love, love is never selfish. I've always wished for the kind of love that will always spare something for oneself. Love that will spare a little for one's own happiness. The love that will not demand for too much and the love that will make you feel at ease. Love is not supposed to stress you out constantly. It will worry you,  yes, but it will never make you question your worth. Now, tell me. What kind of love do you want? I used to love fairytales. So much that I get a little too shallow at times. I just don't know why but I stopped believing in it now. I have turned into a realist and it sucks because sometimes it just becomes a blurry line between being realism and cynicism. I hope you realize that I was only trying...

I guess this is my favorite chapter in Anna Todd's After series. It was genuine and heartfelt. Hardin has always had this taciturn personality. But in this letter, he tried so hard to express his feelings to Tessa by baring his heart and soul. Every single word is piercing. If there is anything I have learned from this letter, it is that if you truly love someone, you will have a brave heart to embrace and admit your flaws, no matter how fucked up it is. It is because  you trust your loved ones that they will accept you for who you are, heart and soul. Because that's what love is - not superficial but deep and meaningful. After We Collided, Chapter 43 Tess,             Since I’m not good with words when trying to relate my inner life, I may have stolen some from Mr. Darcy, whom you fancy so much. I write without any intention of paining you, or humbling myself, by dwelling on wishes which, for the hap...

"You broke my heart but I won't falter." Welcome to this post. Thanks for viewing my blog. I can track the viewing stat, so, hi.  I SEE YOU. 🤗 Someone close to me is deeply pained and it's difficult to witness that. This will serve as a note to myself. I have kept this for so long but I am telling you this now. I know that you have reasons. You have an endless list of defenses. You would try to justify your actions or even try to convince people that you are not to blame. But know that when things do not work out in the end, it is not only one person's fault. So, I just pray that you do not view yourself impeccable. I have nothing but respect for you. You may have done the crappiest thing but I have every bit of respect for you that you deserve. You deserve to be happy and I hope you are. I just wish that in the future, whoever you end up with, you wouldn't have to live with the guilt of sacrificing good things in exchange for a whimsical decision y...

                                  “You’re a writer, an artist and you’re probably just using him as your muse.” These are words by my friend, Beatriz G. when I told her about something that has been bothering me a lot lately. Her words haunted me ever since. Never in the years that I have waited for someone, did I imagine that my love for writing would be the very reason that I would let him go. My close friends know how much I liked him. I could not imagine being with someone else but him. People would tell me that it is a pity. I insist, it’s not.                  Long years passed and nothing has changed. I started questioning myself. How long could I wait? I mean, can anybody really wait forever? I kept on weighing things. Would I really be happy if I get to be with him in the end or would I be regretful for the time I have wasted waiting for ...

                I could not believe that after years and years of waiting, I finally feel fine with the idea of not being with you. God knows how much I wanted to be with you. I was so sure that you were the one who would make me happy. I WAS. But I realized that I was just trying to force the idea of us being together.                 I have defied the universe to wait for you. I thought I could endure it. I have told myself millions of reasons to justify why we should be together. But you know what? We are not just meant to be. From the very beginning, we weren’t. I will take the blame for this. I was just too blind, I guess? Now, it has taken its toll on me. So here I am, finally seeing myself in a different light. I believe it is true – that nobody can wait forever. Oh God, do you have any idea how much I have fought against time? I mean, who am I? Who am I to do ...