11 years ago.

I was reminded of my Lola today. 11 years ago today, I left for college. I still remember hugging my Lola while she was washing the dishes, and she said, sobbingly, “Unalis ka la. Mancollege ka la.” (Aww, I miss your voice, Mama!)

My university was only a few hours away from home, but it felt like such a big thing for both of us. For the first time since I was a kid, we wouldn’t be seeing each other every day. We wouldn’t be sleeping in the same bed. We wouldn’t be having our meals together. And my Mama didn’t even have a phone back then. Video calls weren’t really a thing yet.

I remember thinking hala, OA kami, ang lapit lang naman. I went home the first weekend after I left for college. And most of the weekends after that. Haha!

“Unalis ka la” was such a simple phrase. I don’t think any of us knew how much it would mean to me years later. Because eventually, the time came, there was no Mama waiting for me when I come home.

I never got to fully share this, but in March this year, I had the opportunity to speak at my elementary school. I told them that being there was a tribute to my alma mater, but it was also, in so many ways, a tribute to my grandmother.

That day made me think about how far I’ve come.

From that little girl who just loved getting ChocNut from our canteen, with her Lola waiting for her all day, to this exhausted working adult who somehow managed to sprain her ankle after falling down the MRT stairs. Huhu, haha! Life has taken me so far from that little girl. So many things have changed. So many people, places, and versions of myself have come and gone. But one thing hasn’t changed. I am still my Lola’s girl.

Anyway, nothing special today. I’m just missing my Mama Onsay a little more than usual. If you round off my age, I’m almost 30. But I will still proudly admit that I’m a Lola’s girl. Always. Forever.