“The threshold in accepting what is being done to us is admirable”

Sometimes I think about how long I could endure things.

How long am I going to pretend that everything is okay when I spend nights crying myself to sleep?

What would it take for me to snap out of a world that I created in my mind?

Why is it so difficult to get out of a situation that I willingly got myself into?

With every single reason to walk away.

Finding out things that would have crushed anyone else.

But I stayed.

Really, “admirable” is not even the right word for it.

Dumb, maybe?

I kick myself every day for this. 

For what? For something that won’t even last?

But nothing does, anyway.